What would you say if I told you I have had this “blog” for over a year? What would you say if I told you I have so many blog post written out and have never pushed publish? What would you say if I told you that this crazy dream God gave me has been laying stagnate this whole time because of one word? If you had to guess, what do you think that word might be?

Got a word?

Well if you look at it from the outside my guess would be you might say fear… and you are RIGHT!

So why have I not moved on this God designed dream?

I could name a multitude of reasons and I will give you some but the main one is fear.

Now identifying this and overcoming it has been a long process. The fact of the matter is fear doesn’t come from the Lord it comes from the one who comes to steal, kill, and destroy…satan. I couldn’t let him win.

So where was my fear rooted?

• Am I qualified
• What will people think of me (I in no way have my life together)
• What if people don’t follow me or like what I write
• What if I screw up the launch of the blog and don’t market right
• Self sacrifice – that I want God to shine not me so I will just not write because I want to remain humble

These are just a handful of reasons why I stood still in fear. I find the last fear quite hysterical now because looking at point one through four I find all of those are about ME! 

I had this epiphany. Let me be transparent here… I read a lot of books, did a lot of Bible studies, listened to a lot of sermons and let me be clear, those are great tools.  The fact is no matter how many times, by all of these different preachers, motivational speakers, and authors, I was told to step out in faith, that Jesus has got this, I just didn’t believe. If I don’t believe that the love of God covers me,  I don’t walk by faith not sight or if I become paralyzed by fear, no matter who tells me about overcoming and standing in faith, it won’t happen. This decision to walk in faith has to come from my personal relationship with Jesus.  It is personal decision to stand and say ‘yes Lord, yes Lord, where you call me I will go, where you lead me I will follow’. It’s incredibly personal.

If you turn your Bible to Isaiah 41:8-13

When I read through these verses it is so clear that this personal relationship trumps any fears I have.

v. 8 “But you, O Israel, my servant, Jacob, whom I have chosen, you descendants of Abraham my friend,”

Wait me Lord I am chosen to serve you?

v. 9 “I took you from the ends of the earth, from its farthest corner I called you. I said, You are my servant, I have chosen you and have not rejected you”

Again Lord I am your chosen servant… even when I rejected you, you have not rejected me?

v. 10 “So do not fear, for I am with you, do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

Lord when I am scared of what others will think you will be with me? You will give me strength and help me when I don’t feel adequate to this calling? You will hold me in your loving hands!

v. 11 “All who rage against you will surely be ashamed and disgraced; those who oppose you will be as nothing and perish.”

Lord I should be focused on eternity and helping spread your love. I do not want others to perish due to my fear of personal rejection! 

v. 12 “Though you search for your enemies, you will not find them. Those who wage war against you will be as nothing at all.”

I shouldn’t spend time on those who don’t like my site or my content and focus on those who need Jesus and on your calling and you will lead them to you!

vs. 13 “For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you. Do not fear; I will help you.”

Father thank you for walking with me. I will not fear that which You have called me to do! You are my strength and I will walk hand in hand with you. Thank you.

So lets look at my list after reading Isaiah 41:8-13

• Am I qualified   I am chosen/called 
• What will people think of me (I in no way have my life together)  Do not fear, God will strengthen you
• What if people don’t follow me or like what I write I will not find my enemies if I focus on Jesus. God will bring the right people along at the right time. 
• What if I screw up the launch of the blog and don’t market right He will take my hand and help me, I will not fear. 
• Self sacrifice – that I want God to shine not me so I will just not write because I want to remain humble   God will guide my words He will send those who need help or encouragement, those who seek HIM. I am a vessel for HIM. 

So here I sit writing, not in fear of what others will think of me but in confidence that God’s holding my hand. This is where things changed for me. God knows how many people I am going to help bring to Him. If I was sent to earth to bring one person to Christ, He knows that. It is my job to use the calling I have been given to reach that one person. That is what intentionalvision.org is about. Reaching those who need Jesus and helping encourage His disciples to do the same.

I will close with this…

I attended the IF:Gathering  a few weeks ago and I was incredibly touched and moved by these women and just how authentic they were. That is what I desire for Intentional Vision, pure, authentic, messy, Jesus loving discipleship. On the last day we were given a domino because when one falls into another it has this massive effect. We were challenged to apply this to discipleship. We were then challenged to come up with what God was giving to us. What was He calling us to? What was He speaking over us? See I knew he had called me to be His disciple but I was wrapped up in me in this weird self sacrifice way that I wasn’t being a disciple the way He had told me to be. It was on the very last day the very last speaker David Platt that I heard these words “Just Make A Disciple”… so simple yet so profound. It doesn’t have to be about the masses following; it doesn’t have to be about getting  MY name out there. It is Jesus, His name is what matters, it’s His name that will change the hearts and minds of the lost. So my domino says it best…

 

Selfless Discipleship. One At A Time. Organic & Authentic

I pray triumph over fear in each of your lives.

Stephanie